So Much Stuff . . .

My daughters and I stopped by the thrift store today to look for some needed winter items. We enjoy browsing around as well, finding bargains from time to time. Today, on our way out, my younger daughter noticed an awesome, pink Barbie pickup truck and camper in the free bin. Since the price was right, I went ahead and let her get the item, knowing how much she's been enjoying those dolls presently. The only caveat- we'd have to pick some items to donate because these new items were pretty big.

Once we got home, we headed to the bedroom to look for items that could be swapped out. There was a major hullabaloo about my thoughtless suggestion of donating some Lincoln Logs, though the set had not been played with for years. My middle-school aged son protested deeply and loudly, despite his typical lack of interest in the old building set. As my oldest daughter likes to say (regarding battlefield strategy), "that's not the hill you want to die on"; I decided to let that one lie presently and we discovered other items to purge. It was in the midst of all this that I was really hit suddenly by the weight of all this stuff.

We, I hate to admit, have a "stuff" problem. Our stuff accumulates to the point that it chokes our tiny home. Things that we need can't be found; it's difficult to separate the wheat from the chaff. Items we'd like to use are difficult to get to, or are lost or overlooked because of other unused items, or we simply don't have the place to adequately enjoy them (like train cars my son got from his grandfather-to use them requires a pretty big space commitment).

On the one hand, it seems downright ludicrous to complain about having too much. Talk about a first world problem! But, we are here in the first world, and these are the times and unique situations we happen to be in. And though we try to keep our consumption in check and thoughtfully and mindfully spend for special occasions like birthdays and Christmas, we aren't Spartans by any means. We enjoy celebrating life in all its stages. If there's a bell curve with massively consumeristic folks at one end and folks who live with virtually nothing on the other, I'd bet we're fair to middlin' (or perhaps just a touch on the lighter-consumption side). Also, knowing how to let something go that once gave you joy is monumentally difficult, even for adults. After all, the self-storage industry is partly built up on the failure we tend to have as a people to both consume less and to let things go.

Then again, certainly it's difficult to determine what to do with things at times. We've got an enormous box of small child-sized ski boots. They don't fit anyone in our family, and there are no skis to match. I'll try to offer them to the thrift store. They aren't recyclable, and I'd hate for them to end up in a landfill, but they also may have outlived their useful life and are well worn, perhaps even too worn to be fit to other skis. How many times can these boots be handed down before buckles and straps and bindings just don't work anymore? Or what if you happen to have a TV or a computer you need to get rid of? What about old power cords or a broken blender? You can't sell or donate or even give away for free most old tech. You'll probably wind up paying someone to take it off your hands.

People used to talk about folks in my Grandparents' generation being pack rats because of going through the Great Depression and living with scarcity. They'd horde up twine or old newspapers; we're doing the same thing with boxes or drawers of old computer cables and power cords. I'm not sure what our problem is, as it's certainly not the same issue. 

I read a book about purging stuff by Marie Condo about a decade ago. She suggests holding onto the item in question and deciding whether it sparks joy. That seems a bit simplistic because there are many items (like my vacuum cleaner) that I need but don't feel passionate about. Then there is the question of how to get rid of the unwanted items. As a thrift store shopper, I get annoyed when I buy pants with a broken zipper, a shirt with a small stain or an appliance that doesn't work. Also, sometimes the work to organize and sell a useful item or even to hall something broken away is JUST TOO MUCH right now. All of this winds up feeling so effort-ful that other more important things like washing dishes or making dinner or coloring take over for my time and attention.

For now, I include my children in the conversation about letting those childhood items go. These items do belong to them, and I think it's important to give them time to obtain this skill, though I do slip items of lessor favor out from time to time. Now and then, I'll go on a purge fest and try to par back some of the items that have fallen to the wayside. Most of the time, I'll suffer from some mild inattentional blindness around the issue. Sometimes I feel and see the weight of the excess, and sometimes I don't.

In Defense of Childhood

While tidying around my house this weekend, I'm half listening to my 7 year old's YouTube session. She's enamored by some live acting Disney princess videos or those of the hyper-enthusiastic Cookie Swirl C, who unboxes American Girl dolls or LOL dolls and plays Roblox with her "cookie fans". Jarring into my consciousness is yet another political ad, discussing issues that my daughter and I have yet to discuss.

Regardless of where you stand in the political battles that are raging in America today, these political ads are full of heavy, adult topics that have just launched themselves at my daughter. This blog isn't primarily about politics, although I've written plenty of blogs on that subject. Mostly, it's a critique of our conception of childhood and what is and is not considered acceptable during those brief years these days.

On the one hand, it seems as if parents are tasked with removing any and all possible physical dangers from the lives of our children. Some used to call this idea "helicopter parenting", as the parents were always hovering over their children. Now, I'd say that we're entering the realm of bubble-wrap parenting, where society is not allowing children opportunities to fail, work hard, do chores or be held accountable for their own actions. On the other side of the great parenting divide is a style of parenting known as free-range parenting. While this can initially sound attractive- go out and get muddy, play outside until the sun goes down, etc.; it doesn't quite feel right for me and our family either. I'm not knocking anyone who finds themselves fitting into either one of these categories. The challenging task of raising children to responsible adulthood feels so daunting these days! Neither am I here to say I've figured out all the answers and have the puzzle solved. We're all constantly making decisions based off of our best judgment, based on the needs of our own particular children. I get that.

When the sheer nastiness of the adult political sphere starts to inject itself into the internet and media our children consume daily, it can be more than disheartening. Our children look to us to set examples and the neuroses of the adult sphere are avalanching into the innocence of youth. We'd like to be able to let our kids play without constantly watching over their shoulders. At the same time, there are lots of pitfalls to be aware of. 

Children start doing or handling things outside of their appropriate developmental level partly because we rush them through childhood, emphasizing that eight year olds are more like tweens, tweens are more like teens, and teens are now autonomous countries where anything goes. Our twelve year olds may still want to play like kids do; our high schoolers still need our guidance, discipline and direction, however. 

Too much innocence can lead to danger. "If you fail to understand evil, then you have laid yourself bare to it", states author Jordan Peterson in his most recent book, Beyond Order: 12 More Rules for Life. Perhaps this is why so many folktales and fairy tales of previous times contained truly terrifying things, framed in ways that perhaps made them easier for children to process. Instead of simply stating, "Be very afraid when you walk through the woods because a wolf may attack and eat you," we told tales like "Little Red Riding Hood" that had enough of the danger combined with some comic relief that it was neither too tepid nor too graphic for children to handle.

On the other hand, too much emphasis on the dangers of life can make our children shoulder a burden they are not really ready for, at least not yet. Our youngsters can become neurotic worrying about the environment or school shootings. Or, they can become callous and dismissive of risk. When we sound the alarm for too long at too loud of a tone, alarms themselves lose their effectiveness. Flashback to my freshman year in college. A classmate described hiding from her RA during a fire alarm in her closet, because she was exhausted and there had already been false alarms occurring every night that week. I was shocked at the time, having never faced this concept before, but alarm fatigue is a phenomena that's well documented.

We would never let a toddler play with a butcher knife, and we require youth to reach the age of 16 to be able to drive and 21 to smoke and drink to preserve their physical health. Where dangers for our youth are less frequently confronted seems to be in areas of mental, spiritual and sexual health. Mental health risks are well documented from overuse of social media in teens, especially girls. Hyper-sexualized media and early exposure to pornography can affect our young people's attitudes and behaviors in upcoming relationships in negative ways. Pornography can also be highly addictive and increases objectification of women. It can even drive an older youth's sexual abuse of younger children. The dangers to our children in these realms are very real; as issues such as human trafficking, youth depression, despair, self-harm and even suicide affect growing numbers of our youth today in so many heartbreaking ways. 

So, how do we protect our children's childhoods without going too far? How do we protect them while providing enough opportunities for risks and growth? That truly is the challenge!

First of all, our kids still need structure. Simply put, they need the same people showing up in their lives, day in and day out. Family rules and guidelines about expectations, respect, chores and behaviors need not be the same, but are adaptable to your family's wants and needs. Part of this is fostering responsibility in our youth, laying the groundwork for them to grow into capable young people. Boundaries and boundary education by its nature should start early. We should continue addressing growing concerns, more explicitly and specifically, as they grow. For instance, our archdiocese mandates "Safe Environment Training" for all of the children served by our parish. Our instructor for those in grades K-5 is an engaging and understanding educator, who we're fortunate to have, as she has worked as a teacher for many years. The idea is not to shock children with things that could scare them (and they aren't developmentally ready to handle), like explicit examples of child abuse. Language is kept general while also providing our elementary age children basic ideas about concepts like good boundaries (and their ability to set those boundaries), safe and unsafe touch, safe and unsafe secrets and where to turn for help. I love it how she explains to them to trust their gut and says, "No one is allowed to make you feel unsafe, scared or uncomfortable." We can certainly find ways at home to reiterate those safety messages by discussing boundaries at home, as well as listening carefully when our children express concerns about someone they are interacting with.

Children need us to focus on providing for their whole health. This, of course, means physical health such as well child exams, but how do we help buffer them from the damaging mental health effects of our current society? Overuse of social media can push out interactions in real life. It may feel hellish to limit screen time, or unnecessary, particularly when we ourselves may struggle with limits in this area as well. Of course, it may depend on the age, as we want our older children to be able to limit this for themselves. However, regardless of age, being aware of what your children are viewing or how they are interacting with the internet is a good idea. It can at least help them process whatever is coming at them. Wise boundaries about what activities are age appropriate can be helpful, as well as any efforts on your part to make room for offline interactions, activities, recreation and such. Praying together or including your children in spiritual activities can be profoundly grounding and calming. Cooking together, hiking together, playing a game together and sharing family meals may feel old fashioned or unreachable, but even making the attempt (even if not always possible) can let our kids know that we care about them. We should not let the yearning for the perfect to be the enemy of the good when we struggle to do what we can to implement these types of activities 

Brave conversation, to me, seems to be my best answer, as I attempt to walk the tightrope between too much constraint and too much permissiveness with parenting. Children must be taught how to think, not what to think, stated author and anthropologist Margaret Mead. When we get in there and have those brave conversations about our bodies, our boundaries, our health and the consequences for our choices in those regards, our children, particularly the older ones, may not always agree with us. They may form their own opposing opinions; but at least they know what we think about these topics and why we hold those beliefs. Regardless of whether or not we think our kids will listen to us, we have a calling as their parents to share our insights as well as our love with them. One-on-one conversations about difficult topics can feel difficult, but talking and listening, regardless of the topic, will lay the groundwork for something else even more key. Not only will you be providing the structure, moral orientation and character development that your children need as a backbone to human flourishing. You're also sending a very important message. You hear them, and you want to talk to them. Furthermore, you'll always be there to talk to them and help them, regardless of whatever particular difficult situation they are facing. And that is, truly, the most important thing of all.

Home, interrupted

 In the past month, I've heard through social media of two long-time residents of our local community each desperately searching for a new place to rent. Since I live and work in a resort community, I'm unfortunately used to problems with housing, particularly housing for those who are not the highest level wage earners in our community. The problem with a lack of affordable housing in mountain communities stretches back decades and arches over states. It also brings back the memories of my own brush with the monster of "market value" a little over 7 years ago. 

A brief recap of our personal tale began while we had a newborn and two elementary-aged children. We lived in an apartment complex, in a three-bedroom apartment, in what was designated an affordable housing complex. Since this complex was built by the Sisters of Mercy, a Catholic Charity, in the 90's, it offered residents with low to moderate income in our communities a place to live that was within reach of their means. After a few years living there, we found out that we were receiving a 47% rent increase, due to start within 30 days. The feeling behind that number was panic and chaos. Fortunately in our case, we were grateful to find new, more cramped accommodations in another town close by. The reason for the increase? The property had been sold, and so a "market adjustment" was performed. A "market adjustment" that wound up forcing ourselves and several other residents to move.

Our family's long term housing story looks much more bright these days, as we are nearing completion of the home we've been building these last 7 years. We're one of the lucky few who have stumbled upon a personal solution to our community's housing crisis, and I have to admit, I do have a bit of survivor's guilt associated with that. I certainly recognize becoming a homeowner-builder isn't a path that most other people would be able to take, especially as buildable lots (not owned by developers) have both dwindled in numbers and skyrocketed in price. Increases in building costs, supply chain issues, and the increasingly formiable regulatory processes now make an already challenging task a Herculean effort. Even though I am a very positive, persistent person, if I had to start this build now, I probably simply wouldn't.

Ironically, new building in our county is going like mad. Unfortunately, for the folks who need housing most, the working class, it seems to be a case of "water, water, everywhere, but not a drop to drink." While there is new construction occurring in most towns in our area, the focus has been largely on luxury, high-end houses and condos, with few, if any, units being added that could be considered truly affordable or attainable. 

Of course, it is clear from a solely fiscal point of view why the working class is de-prioritized in the housing conversation. There is certainly much more money to be made from building high-end dwellings. More recently, though, it feel like our community has moved from ignoring the issues of housing for the working class to actively contributing harm. There has been a disturbing trend in the area of buying up trailer parks and apartment complexes, tearing them down, and building new luxury condos, apartments or single-family homes. In a nearby resort town, many folks had to leave the area or even the state because their trailer park was sold out from under them. One person was unable to move his trailer to a park in an adjacent town because it just was a couple years too old for that particular park's covenants. At my own trailer park, "unsightly" fixer uppers were pulled down to appease code enforcement, eliminating potential units. Talk about failures of our bureaucracy. 

When desirability couples with a lack of available units, it drives the increase of rents for even those who still have units to live in. That monster "market value" destroys a renter's peace of mind right alongside of their fiscal stability. Competition in the rental market begins to make the dream of a roof over your head a pipe dream (not even that loftier goal of home ownership, something that many folks here have had to flat out give up on). 

Take the number you are paying for your current home right now. Now, multiply it by 47%, the increase we personally had. Or double it. I've heard folks tell me this has happened to them. Could you still afford it at the drop of a hat? Now, consider the folks who are most likely to have to weather these increases are the ones who are least likely to have the money to do so. Many members of the working class here are already grinding away at multiple jobs. The physical, spiritual and mental health implications of trying to increase the number of hours or the number of jobs held ad infinitum just to keep paying the landlord is huge. Facing potential homelessness is also traumatic for people, especially children, and the cold overnight temperatures of the Rocky Mountains could literally kill people without shelter. 

A philosophical (or lack of philosophical) shift affects the very groundwork of our housing throughout America, not just in here in Resort Country, Colorado. Our thinking about housing has become twisted in our homeland by losing the sight of the home. Instead, the view of home is replaced by an overarching demand for financial performance. Homes are investments, gobbled up by investors. Instead of thinking of a house as having an inherent value of its own, as a place to be lived in by a person who in turn needs a place to live, we drive to squeeze as much possible monetary compensation from a place while losing nearly all of our focus on its true inherent value, that of a dwelling. The value of a home is first and foremost a place of stability. It is a place that protects its inhabitants from both the weather and the unknown. Shelter is always a necessary thing for humans. We have been living in various types of shelter from our beginnings, but modern people are no longer able to just supply this necessity for ourselves. Houses have always been a wealth generating tool, but now we act like this is their sole purpose. 

I am not a person who is interested in class warfare. I don't want to tear down the affluent. I don't want to drive the second homeowners, vacationers, tourists and upstarts out of our area. But, we have to do better at looking at the whole equation when it comes to what our community needs and how we need to accomplish a well rounded plan with adequate units available for each class of citizen. We can start by stopping the practice of tearing down the homes of some unfortunate folks to build homes for those who don't even need homes. It is a philosophical shift, but we need to stop de-prioritizing the needs of those who aren't the wealthiest, because wealth is not the sole measure of our community.  

When we place all of our value on homes in the considering of what they can make for us financially, we're missing the mark by a long shot. We're focused on an investment, not a place to live. We're missing the purpose behind homes for as long as people have built them. And that creates a type of blindness.

I've found this blog harder to write than most. First of all, the complexity of the issues at hand means that there are many directions that I could take this concept. Then, there is the emotion of remembering our own frantic move. The fear and horror of watching more of the same unfold again and again. Seeing post after post online of folks who've had their place sold out from under them. Those things can start to add up to a discouraging "nothing ever changes" feeling of powerlessness. You can see why I've had to stop myself from writing many times, to come up for air. Lastly, I don't feel like I know or can pinpoint a certain solution- my typical approach in my blog- point to something positive or a specific path that I could see to get us out of our housing problems. However, instead of doing that, instead of focusing on the practical, I'm going to ask us to change our hearts.

What if people acted towards groceries in the way they are acting towards housing? We would not stand for it. What if the locals were told we could only shop last, after all of the others had gotten their fill, and too bad if there is no milk and eggs left? Then imagine a carton of eggs.  Of the dozen, only 2 of the eggs were eaten and the rest have been left to spoil. Someone wanted to make a bowl of cereal with a cup of the milk- and now the rest of the gallon curdles in the fridge. There are no apples left, but there are apples left for the right person. We'd go to buy a loaf of bread, but we'd leave hungry because we were outbid and someone else was willing and able to pay $500 for it. Not only does this portrait look foolish; this portrait looks wasteful. And it hurts my heart. I suppose it is a little simplistic, and I'm not pushing for huge governmental reforms or redistribution schemes. But if you are one of the group of people that have agency, will you keep in mind that we can never have homes for our workforce community to live in if we never build them, or if we never save them from destruction? 

Each time I receive a post card from one of our local realtors stating that housing prices have increased 16% from year to year, it makes my heart sink. I want to gnash my teeth and howl. It feels like gasoline's being thrown on a dumpster fire. If you are one of the many who've been impacted by our housing crisis, I see you.  Tell your story. 

A Pro-Life Response to the Leaked Dobbs Draft

 It's been a few weeks now since the leak of Justice Alito's Dobbs draft verdict sent shock waves around our nation. People on both sides of the debate have taken to protests and counter-protests in the streets, at the Supreme Court, and even at Supreme Court justices' homes. Alito has been taken into a safe house as threats for his safety have been made. Protesters have attempted to disrupt Catholic mass at a California church. It feels like an unsettled time; particularly because the final result is not yet set in stone and the aftermath of that final result is not yet known.

As a pro-life person, I can certainly see the value of legal protection for the unborn which would occur if the Dobbs case continues on to repeal Roe V. Wade. At the same time, and as many in the pro-life movement have been stating for many years, repealing Roe V. Wade complicates things. Right now, crisis pregnancy centers can certainly attest to that, as some are being violently attacked because of the draft verdict. Many of these pro-life folks aren't political. They are simply focused on saving two lives at a time; that particular mama and that particular baby that have made it in front of them. Other than advertising, they aren't going out into the world to seek mothers in crisis. They know that women need their services and those mothers will seek them out. They wait with smiling faces for whomever comes walking through the door of their crisis pregnancy center. Now, they also have to worry that someone might throw a brick through their door. It's certainly a challenging time.

Ordinary folks have flocked to social media to describe their concerns with overcoming Roe. There are two main arguments against repealing Roe that are circulating right now. These are the points I would like to respond to. As always, my goal is to get all of us, pro-choice and pro-life people alike, thinking and discussing those deep, hard questions that arise at times like these.

The "Forced Birth" Narrative

The "Forced Birth" narrative states that women who have gotten pregnant will now be forced to give birth, since abortion may not be legal in the state in which they live. This narrative depends upon "The Patriarchy", a group of crazed, old, Puritanical, male politicians who are interested in serving as the morality police and jumping through the bedroom door and catching people in the act of whatever kinky sex act they are committing, then hauling them out and having them placed in the stocks. Since these women aren't supposed to have sex, the narrative states, they are being punished for their crimes by being forced to carry their pregnancy to term. 

The trouble with the "Forced Birth" narrative is that it attempts to look at everything completely backwards. The natural and logical consequence of sex is actually reproduction. That is why we call the uterus, vagina, penis, testicles et al part of the reproductive system. These organs, coupled together in a certain way, lead to pregnancy. Those of us who are women have a body that prepares for pregnancy EVERY MONTH. Just in case. Pregnancy is not an aberration. Decades of sex ed in America and our culture is still immersed in a type of science denialism that is shocked when a baby is created after intercourse. 

But wait, we've invented birth control, you say! Isn't that the solution to that dirty old inconvenience of fertility? Any of us 80's kids can remember back to Jurassic Park when the dinosaurs were all female, and so they couldn't breed, right? Then, Jeff Goldbloom's character finds a nest of eggs. (He's that quirky chaos theory scientist who made the movie worth watching.) He utters the phrase, "Life will find a way". It's kind of the same with our reproductive systems. They are simply trying to do what they are build to do, and sometimes they get around our "safe sex" protocols and life is begun.

So, we have people who don't act as though their reproductive systems are meant for reproduction. When they then are confronted with the natural and logical consequence of pregnancy, we're stating then that they are forced to give birth. Why are we not angry with a society that sold our citizens the promise of safety with their birth control? Why are we not angry with those that give an illusion that sex could be without consequences? 

Fine, some would say, we will just get rid of the consequence. Abortion is an alternative, and we can have that woman "back to normal" in no time. But here is the inconvenient truth. Abortion ends the life of a child. Period. Whether it is a very young child, or a child ready to be born tomorrow, it ends the life of a child. That's inconvenient. It's annoying. But it's true. I, and many like me, would state that this child, being human, is entitled by law to protection of life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. 

So, it is a great difficulty to overcome that we've created a society that depends upon abortion, the deliberate ending of a life, in order to function. That doesn't make that society great or just or right. It's just where we are at this place in time. Our country needs abortion to meet the demands of the current culture in the same way that the south needed slavery before the civil war. Let that sink in.

The Burden on The Poor

Another concern voiced is the one that the poor in the country would shoulder an undue burden from the repeal of Roe V. Wade because they may live in a state that will restrict or make abortion illegal. Since that woman is poor, she wouldn't have the luxury of traveling to another state to have an abortion. That woman would then wind up parenting her child without having the resources to adequately do so. Alternatively, she may wind up having an illegal abortion and could wind up losing her life in the process. 

This, too, is a concern for me. I feel a special kinship to the world's poor. I try to live in solidarity with the poor as much as I can. As such, I try to do what I can to help my brothers and sisters who are going without. As a mother with three children, I know that it can be especially challenging to make ends meet with more mouths to feed.

So, perhaps we should ask ourselves two things. Are children inherently more valuable if they come to rich people? And would more people choose life if they had more resources?

The first concept, stemming from an elitism that grades people on their socioeconomic status, is troublesome because we know that there are some very exceptional people who have been born into impoverished circumstances. We can also think anecdotally about people who are the children of wealthy parents who also may not have turned into the most amazing members of our society. The ideas that privilege can actually be a problem in our society and that poverty builds resilience are both fairly straightforward. 

Wealthy elites may decide that poorer people should not have children because they are a burden and a drain on society. However, when our society deems it so, we forget that people are actually a resource. Sure, kids do take up resources to begin life, especially if we want to emphasize raising them the "Western Way"- orthodontia and iphones and college. However, each child may in turn become a resource for both society and their families. It is an investment in the future of our country that every parent and every teacher understands well. It is also what our ancestors saw children and how our ancestors lived. 

Would more people choose life if they had more resources? Consider the fact that economic reasons are stated as a reason for the vast majority of abortions. The resources to parent or to find adoptive parents for their children can change many parents' hearts and minds. Changing hearts and minds are what the pro-life ministry has been about all these years while operating crisis pregnancy centers. Likewise, providing resources for parents are a huge part of the crisis pregnancy center's activities. Going forward, if we wind up finding we in fact are living in a post-Roe world, we as a society need to renew our responsibilities to those people facing crisis pregnancies. Are we a society of abundance or a society of scarcity? I think if you can look around at our privileged lives, you can answer that question. 

Pride, Power and War

Our language has had a seismic shift when it comes to the word "pride". The connotations of the word are now seeped in positive light. We might say things like "I'm proud of you!" or "He's my pride and joy!" or "She beamed with pride!" All of these are certainly positive things. However, with the change in our language, we run the risk of losing our grasp of something key. These are the great number of problems that the sin of pride can cause.

Why is pride problematic? Or perhaps, the word problematic is too weak. After all, in the Catholic tradition, pride is considered to be the worst of the seven deadly sins. A friend of mine posted a thought-provoking post a few weeks ago about the dangers to one's own soul from the sin of pride. It described things that pride might rob one from, such as not learning a lesson from an unfortunate circumstance we've gone through or not repairing a relationship because we keep a chip on our shoulder. There are many ways that we can injure ourselves through the sin of pride, but they are just a drop in the bucket to ways we can injure others through the sin of pride. 

So, at its root, the sin of pride is about disordered thinking. Locked into a comparison with others, we assert that our needs or wants circumvent theirs. Of course, how much of an impact this disordered thinking has depends on the end result. On the mild end of the spectrum, a kid might hog more than one's fair share of the halloween candy. On the serious end of the spectrum, a sexual predator decides fulfilling his desires are more important than the victim's needs not to be attacked. Most if not all major sins have the sin of pride at the core.

It can be normal and natural to want to advance our own cause, but we as a society instinctively recognize that when we violate the rules of fair play, we have crossed a line. That line is important, because it allows us to have a just society (or at least to aim towards a just society, since this is rarely perfected). We can sniff out a cheat, chew people out who jump the line, and we will cheer for the underdog in a movie who follows the rules even though it means he comes out behind. 

If I, as an ordinary person, stumble and succumb to the sin of pride, it is likely that the impact would be somewhat mild. No matter how prideful most ordinary citizens are, they have a limited number of resources to advance themselves. Face it, we ordinary folks have a limited amount of power.

As I write this, Ukraine is being invaded by Russia. This act weighs on most people's minds these days regardless of how close the impact is. Disordered thinking, or the sin of pride, if you prefer, has coupled with power to convince key Russian leaders that 1. it is permissible to advance Russian's interests beyond the Ukraine's needs to continue to live a life not torn by violence AND 2. that Russian powers are great enough that they may be successful.

So, as you can see, the sin of pride and the disordered thinking it generates can couple with power to create war. Unfortunately, this is a pattern that is as old as humanity.

It is devastating to realize how quickly destructive power can tear a hole in a country and how difficult and time-consuming the rebuilding process is. As our local priest described it today, it can take but a moment to launch a missile and years to rebuild the apartment complex it destroys. A man can be shot in a second, while it took him 53 years to develop to this point. An act of rape takes only a few minutes to perpetrate; the recovery of the victim can take decades or more. 

This cannot be the final word, however. Destructive forces are powerful, but they aren't as powerful as life-giving forces. We can shoot a man in war, but we can't take the same dead man and breathe new life into him. And because we are called for good, we yearn for better. Right now, many ordinary people in Russia are bravely standing up to those decision makers against this war at great personal risk.

We can't live and love and thrive in a world that is beset by destructive forces. Destruction ultimately wears itself out. We see this same pattern play out in the Resurrection of Christ. Christ was killed during his crucifixion, but death did not have the final say. It may seem like peace isn't powerful, but it truly is. No matter where we live, our hearts are made for life-building. We all yearn for justice; we want to build a thriving, fruitful society. I join others in the world who raise their weary voices in prayers for peace. May those voices rise until they drown out the ones calling for destruction.